Staffel 7

Folgen

1. 1. Folge 1

   7. Sept. 1999

   Dave rants about the CBS/Viacom merger; Kevin James promotes a new comedy special.

2. 2. Folge 2

   8. Sept. 1999

   Dave tries to call Sumner Redstone's office, then persuades Ricki Lake to make a crank call to Oprah.

3. 3. Folge 3

   9. Sept. 1999

   Craig Kilborn promotes some talk show that comes on after Dave's.

4. 4. Folge 4

   10. Sept. 1999

   John Popper sits in with the band, while Alan punches Sumner Redstone during CBS Mailbag.

5. 5. Folge 5

   13. Sept. 1999

   George Clarke dances in a diaper; Dave shows a ""highlight"" from last night's Emmy win: a clip of Rob Burnett kissing his wife at the ceremony (he forgot last year).

6. 6. Folge 6

   14. Sept. 1999

   Andrea Sande and Nadine Hennelly help Joe G's with a Y2K Inspection. They pass, of course.

7. 7. Folge 7

   15. Sept. 1999

   Throughout the night, staffer Brian Donahue falls down staircases. Later, Meatloaf promotes ""Crazy in Alabama.""

8. 8. Folge 8

   16. Sept. 1999

   With the possibility of a rare hurricane hitting New York City, Paul checks for ""talk show closings"" and Dave comes on stage in a poncho and galoshes. Meanwhile, Jenna Elfman hijacks Anton's drumset, and Christina Aguilera performs ""What a Girl Wants.""

9. 9. Folge 9

   17. Sept. 1999

   During CBS Mailbag, Alan threatens to beat up Secretary of the Treasury Lawrence Summers, but he goes to his anger management counselor instead.

10. 10. Folge 10

    20. Sept. 1999

    Joe Haden fills in for Alan; Warren Zevon fills in for Paul; Rupert walks over to the CBS Store and reviews the new fall shows on CBS.

11. 11. Folge 11

    21. Sept. 1999

    Paul and a local high schooler try their best to learn how to parallel park, while Robin Williams promotes ""Bicentennial Man.""

12. 12. Folge 12

    22. Sept. 1999

    Alan, Regis, Bill Delace, and Mike McIntee portray members of the audience during ""Who Asked For It?""; Ashley Judd promotes ""Double Jeopardy.""

13. 13. Folge 13

    23. Sept. 1999

    Dave announces that next year, the show will be rechristened ""Late Show 2000,"" while Roger Ebert promotes his revamped talk show.

14. 14. Folge 14

    24. Sept. 1999

    During CBS Mailbag, Harold Larkin comments on body piercing, while Dave ""appears"" in a Gap commercial.

15. 15. Folge 15

    27. Sept. 1999

    Biff gives a blanket to a cold audience girl; Chewy the Dog looks for truffles; Tom Waits sings with a bullhorn.

16. 16. Folge 16

    28. Sept. 1999

    Nadine, Andrea, Sirajul (but not Mujibur) and Joe G. play ""Who Wants to Win a Giant Phony Check for $1,000,000?"" Later, Alan promotes a film he just produced called ""For the Ladies"" (which turns out to be weightlifting porn flick).

17. 17. Folge 17

    29. Sept. 1999

    Dave tells another dentist-related horror story; in ""New for Fall,"" Mujibur and Sirajul star in the Bollywood musical ""Basanta Gan Gaibay""; Evander Holyfield presents the Top Ten, but Lennox Lewis interupts to introduce #1.

18. 18. Folge 18

    30. Sept. 1999

    Kevin Spacey promotes ""American Beauty,"" then gives Dave a bag of Presidential M&M's. Later, Harold Larkin tells one of the ""True Stories of the Late Show Stagehands"": He walks into a mysterious closet backstage, falls into a black hole, then walks out in a nonchalant fashion.

19. 19. Folge 19

    1. Okt. 1999

    Alan's angry because he's not allowed to punch anybody; Dave goes berzerk adjusting his tie; Alan beats up writer Joe Toplyn under Mujibur and Sirajul's supervision.

20. 20. Folge 20

    4. Okt. 1999

    ""Biff Henderson's America"" spends four days in Turkey, Texas; David Bowie performs ""Thursday's Child.""

21. 21. Folge 21

    5. Okt. 1999

    Mujibur and Sirajul sample food at Hello Deli; an ad for ""Late Show on Tour,"" with Jackie Mason playing Dave; In honor of tonight's guest, Dave announces that he will no longer make any more jokes relating to Dan Quayle.

22. 22. Folge 22

    6. Okt. 1999

    Tonight's edition of ""True Stories of the Late Show Stagehands"" finds Pat and Kenny in a plane crash over the Andes, where they're reduced to cannibalism.

23. 23. Folge 23

    7. Okt. 1999

    A 100-year-old man presents the Top Ten; Biff waits on the fire escape by 53rd street and yells to President Clinton's motorcade that he has snacks.

24. 24. Folge 24

    8. Okt. 1999

    1999: During CBS Mailbag, Pat Farmer presents ""Great Pats throughout History."" Later, Sting performs ""Brand New Day.""

25. 25. Folge 25

    11. Okt. 1999

    Carole King sits in with Paul, then sings a duet with Bruce Willis.

26. 26. Folge 26

    12. Okt. 1999

    Joe G. joins Mujibur and Sirajul to play ""Where Can I Get a Decent Meal in This Town?"" Later, Billy Blanks does a Tae-bo demonstration.

27. 27. Folge 27

    13. Okt. 1999

    The outside cam presents Paul Fiore's driver's test in New Jersey, with commentary by Biff and pictures from the WCBS-TV helicopter. When he finishes the test, a babe presents him flowers and Gov. Christine Todd Whitman presents Paul's license.

28. 28. Folge 28

    14. Okt. 1999

    Warren Zevon fills in for Paul yet again; Dave wants to say the s-word ""because they did on ‘Chicago Hope,'"" tries it, and gets beeped; Biff gives Yankees tickets to an audience member.

29. 29. Folge 29

    15. Okt. 1999

    During CBS Mailbag, Alan Kalter promotes his Millenium Party, which looks like a disaster in the making. Later, Dave presents ""Top Ten Things That Sound Creepy When Said by John Malkovich.""

30. 30. Folge 30

    25. Okt. 1999

    Paul and Dave talk about the band's weekend gig at the White House; for his latest World Series report, Biff interviews, amongst others, Evander Holyfield and John Rocker; the octogenarian stars of the hit documentary ""The Buena Vista Social Club"" perform.

31. 31. Folge 31

    26. Okt. 1999

    Dave shows a clip from the recently cancelled CBS sitcom Work With Me. Later, David Diaz of WCBS-TV beats up a punk during an on-the-street report.

32. 32. Folge 32

    27. Okt. 1999

    Martha Stewart makes Halloween treats; Jets QB Vinny Testaverde helps with the annual ""Halloween Costumes"" segment.

33. 33. Folge 33

    28. Okt. 1999

    Security boss Bill DeLace disrupts last night's Gore-Bradley debate; your 1999 World Champion New York Yankees present the Top Ten; Denzel Washington plugs ""The Bone Collector.""

34. 34. Folge 34

    29. Okt. 1999

    Dave shows a dumb picture of him outside, then gets marksman Armando Aiello to shoot paint balls at it; Dave disses Harmony Korine, who made some choice comments after getting bumped the other night; Mike McIntee and Bill DeLace guard the world's largest pumpkin (1131 pounds).

35. 35. Folge 35

    1. Nov. 1999

    Dave tells a lengthy Halloween candy story, then incorporates his voice into the talking dog from those ""Taco Bell"" commercials.

36. 36. Folge 36

    2. Nov. 1999

    Dave says hello to all the folks in King's Height Rest Home in New York; Rage Against the Machine performs ""War Within a Breath"" on the roof in pouring rain.

37. 37. Folge 37

    3. Nov. 1999

    14-year-old music prodigy Shannon Kerman sits in; Paul's most vivid memory of this year's World Series is reinterpreted by Martin Scorsese and Ricky Martin; after Mujibur and Sirajul play ""Where Can I Get a Decent Meal in This Town?"" at the trendy Ranch 1 restuarant, Biff brings in fried chicken, an item that they claimed they didn't have.

38. 38. Folge 38

    4. Nov. 1999

    A cannon called the Alludium 2000 Pumpkin Modulator, along with its operator Max Teasdale, wait to launch a giant pumpkin into orbit on 53rd Street. Also, Roberta Glasspari and The East Harlem Violinists (subjects of the film ""Music of the Heart"") perform with soloist Mark O'Connor.

39. 39. Folge 39

    5. Nov. 1999

    Live via satellite, a lone microphone stands in the sun for an open mike night in the Mojave Desert. Also, Dr. Lou Arrone gives flu shots to the audience.

40. 40. Folge 40

    8. Nov. 1999

    NYC Marathon winners Joseph Chebet (of Kenya) and Adrianna Fernandez (of Mexico) run across the stage; Dave mentions that staff members Jay Johnson, Fred Dhimizu and Patty McDonald ran in the same marathon; Kenny Sheehan performs in the Broadway revival of ""Annie.""

41. 41. Folge 41

    9. Nov. 1999

    Dave mentions that he's #64 on Entertainment Weekly's list of 100 Greatest Entertainers (inbetween Joni Mitchell and Jim Carrey); live via satellite, it's another Open Mic Night in the Mojave Desert; Boots Randolph sits in on sax; Jane Clayson plugs ""The Early Show.""

42. 42. Folge 42

    10. Nov. 1999

    Dave announces the premiere of ""Good Old-Fashioned Fun,"" which includes Harold Larkin making a snow angel in mayonnaise and Mujibur and Sirajul racing to the death in a soap box derby. Later, former Spice Girl Melanie C sings ""I Turn To You.""

43. 43. Folge 43

    11. Nov. 1999 6.0

    Dave shows a tape of stunt biker/scheduled guest Travis Pastrana's mishap that afternoon, and the injured daredevil later hobbles onstage. By the end of the show, the Hi-Ho Girls are helping Travis repair his bike.

44. 44. Folge 44

    12. Nov. 1999

    Jay Johnson gives a tour of the set of ""The Early Show with Bryant Gumbel and Jane Clayson."" Also, Dr. Lou Arrone does his seasonal audience flu shots.

45. 45. Folge 45

    15. Nov. 1999

    Dave shows a clip that shows that even though he's only been on the network for two weeks, but there's already trouble on Bryant Gumbel's Early Show. Midway through an interview, a guy accidentally has his arm cut off. Later, Dave and Claudia Schiffer blow up chestnuts in a microwave oven.

46. 46. Folge 46

    16. Nov. 1999

    Dave looks over the 2000 Places Rated Almanac, and then calls Donald Green, the mayor of Kankakee, Illinois, the city which rated lowest. As a condolence, Dave presents the mayor with a gazebo, courtesy of ""Gazebo Weekly.""

47. 47. Folge 47

    17. Nov. 1999

    During a segment called ""What They're Doing to Boost Their Ratings,"" magician John Bundy makes a cue card disappear.

48. 48. Folge 48

    18. Nov. 1999

    Ted Danson plugs ""Becker,"" while Dave demands that #5 in the Top Ten be rewritten at the last minute.

49. 49. Folge 49

    19. Nov. 1999

    Gabriel Bryne plugs ""End of Days,"" while Dave says hi to Mark Borchardt's friend Mike.

50. 50. Folge 50

    22. Nov. 1999

    Dave, Bill DeLace, Pat Farmer, Biff, intern Laura McCloud, Mike McIntee, Harold Larkin, Paul, Tommy Gordon, and George Clarke comment on ""What They're Thankful For.""

51. 51. Folge 51

    23. Nov. 1999

    Tony Mendez and Bill DeLace star in the new CBS midseason replacement series ""Next Time Bring Your Sister, You Hump."" Also, Kathie Lee Gifford delivers a turkey to Dave.

52. 52. Folge 52

    24. Nov. 1999

    ""Biff Henderson's America"" visits the ranching community of Meeteetse, WY.

53. 53. Folge 53

    25. Nov. 1999

    Live via satellite from Indianapolis, Mrs. Dorothy Letterman stands in her kitchen while Dave guesses what pies she baked for Thanksgiving. Afterwards, Dorothy shows her refrigerator is loaded with bottle after bottle of Colt 45® malt liquor.

54. 54. Folge 54

    26. Nov. 1999

    A dog that fetches beer appears on ""Stupid Human Tricks""; Dave rants that all the other talk shows are copying the aforementioned segment; another Open Mic Night in the Mohave Desert turns up nothing; Rudy Giuliani presents the Top Ten.

55. 55. Folge 55

    29. Nov. 1999

    During the segment ""The Best and Worst of the Millennium,"" an image of Sam Donaldson's eyebrows suddenly comes to life. Also, during tonight's Open Mic in the Mojave Desert, a technician tests the open mike and adjusts the height.

56. 56. Folge 56

    30. Nov. 1999

    Dave announces Monica Lewinsky is dating a former LSDL writer; a customer at Joe G's becomes the subject of his own ""E! True Hollywood Story""; Jenny McCarthy plugs ""Scream 3.""

57. 57. Folge 57

    1. Dez. 1999

    Glen Campbell sits in; Dave discusses the list of good and bad cities that he mentioned on the show last month, then checks in with Kankakee, IL mayor Donald Green, who receives another gazebo from Dave; Tim Robbins gets clobbered playing ice hockey.

58. 58. Folge 58

    2. Dez. 1999

    For the umpteenth time this year, Dave orders Inky to spit out his gum; in honor of the Pokemon craze, Dave and the audience play ""Know Your Japanese Cartoon Crap.""

59. 59. Folge 59

    3. Dez. 1999
60. 60. Folge 60

    13. Dez. 1999
61. 61. Folge 61

    14. Dez. 1999
62. 62. Folge 62

    15. Dez. 1999

    Throughout the night, various members of the Philadelphia Flyers shoot pucks at a cardboard cutout of Dave. Also, the Turkish guy has been promoted to stagehand.

63. 63. Folge 63

    16. Dez. 1999
64. 64. Folge 64

    17. Dez. 1999
65. 65. Folge 65

    20. Dez. 1999
66. 66. Folge 66

    21. Dez. 1999
67. 67. Folge 67

    22. Dez. 1999
68. 68. Folge 68

    23. Dez. 1999
69. 69. Folge 69

    27. Dez. 1999

    Feeling a little warm, Dave takes off his coat and does most of the show in just his shirt and tie; in ""Who Asked For It?"" Patrick Stewart and the Taco Bell chihuahua star in ""A Christmas Carol;"" Biff performs a holiday-themed duet with a cardboard cutout of Celine Dion.

70. 70. Folge 70

    28. Dez. 1999
71. 71. Folge 71

    29. Dez. 1999
72. 72. Folge 72

    30. Dez. 1999
73. 73. Folge 73

    31. Dez. 1999
74. 74. Folge 74

    3. Jan. 2000
75. 75. Folge 75

    4. Jan. 2000
76. 76. Folge 76

    5. Jan. 2000
77. 77. Folge 77

    6. Jan. 2000
78. 78. Folge 78

    7. Jan. 2000
79. 79. Folge 79

    10. Jan. 2000
80. 80. Folge 80

    11. Jan. 2000
81. 81. Folge 81

    12. Jan. 2000
82. 82. Folge 82

    13. Jan. 2000

    Dave thanks Rob Burnett for landing Hillary Clinton on the show; Art Donovan plays ping pong with the disgusting Turkish guy; Lynyrd Skynard performs ""Sweet Home Alabama.""

83. 83. Folge 83

    14. Jan. 2000

    Regis comes out for his interview with the disgusting Turkish guy, and later Dave tells him he's scheduled for an angiogram tomorrow morning.

84. 84. Folge 84

    7. Feb. 2000

    It's the debut of Late Show Backstage, a clip show hosted tonight by Charles Grodin while Dave recovers from his quintuple-bypass surgery three weeks before. Amongst the highlights: Charles chats with Julia Roberts, Dave's interview with J.Ro from May 17, 1999, a Top Ten list from John Malkovich (see Show #1307), and to cap the night, Charles and surprise guest Regis Philbin.

85. 85. Folge 85

    8. Feb. 2000

    ""Backstage,"" Day 2: Regis is now sitting in a whole new ""hot seat"" as the clip show's second host in as many nights. Tonight, he chats with Jerry Seinfeld, who introduces footage of Dave doing the Top Ten without pants, and Danny DeVito, who for one reason or another shows a clip from Taxi.

86. 86. Folge 86

    9. Feb. 2000

    Backstage #3: Paul appears on the Late Show for the first time since Dave's surgery, sitting on a movie set with Bruce Willis and his old friend Martin Short. Amongst tonight's clips: Bruce doing various stunts; Casey Kasem presents the Top Ten (see Show #0005); Dave makes crank phone calls (also Show #0005); Martin Short sings a selection from the musical Little Me.

87. 87. Folge 87

    10. Feb. 2000

    Backstage, Day 4: Regis hosts again, chatting with Bill Cosby, Sarah Jessica Parker, and ""the great"" Pat Farmer. Amongst the clips: Bill goes to the balcony via a ladder; a Top Ten featuring Barry White; Dave and Sarah mingle with Kid Scientists.

88. 88. Folge 88

    11. Feb. 2000

    Backstage, Day 5: Paul hosts again, this time with Dave's buddies Steve Martin and Billy Crystal. Amongst the clips: Steve mans a projector to show a clip from his latest movie (see Show #0499); the Top Ten list from the fifth anniversary special, with Jerry Seinfeld escorting Dave's mom onstage; Dave hangs out with Olympic judges (see Show #0963). At the end of the show, Paul and Billy goof around behind the scenes at The Price Is Right.

89. 89. Folge 89

    14. Feb. 2000

    Backstage, Day 6: In the cold opening, Paul tries to hit on Drew Barrymore. Amongst the clips: Drew flashing Dave on his 48th birthday; Drew and Dave getting married one month after said clip; ten beautiful women present the Top Ten (see Show #0543); Ray Romano singing ""Silent Night"" as his kids beat each other up.

90. 90. Folge 90

    15. Feb. 2000

    Backstage, Day 7: Comedian David Brenner interrogates Kathie Lee Gifford and Alec Baldwin. Tonight's clips: Dave hijacks the Butterball turkey hotline (see Show #1345); a Top Ten remote from Bill DeLace; Alec shares child-rearing tips with Dave.

91. 91. Folge 91

    16. Feb. 2000

    Backstage, Day 8: Former ""Tomorrow"" and ""Late Late Show"" host Tom Snyder trades a bon mot or two with Norm MacDonald and Don Rickles. Tonight's clips: Norm vents after being demoted on SNL (see Show #0936); a Top Ten from Demi Moore; Don tells Dave how he met Frank Sinatra.

92. 92. Folge 92

    17. Feb. 2000

    Backstage, Day 9: Tom Snyder's still here, and this time he hosts Mike Myers, Roseanne Barr, and Bonnie Hunt. Tonight's clips: Dave shows film footage of Mike as a Canadian Cub Scout; Mike wishes his mom a happy birthday (see Show #0960); a Top Ten from James Earl Jones; Roseanne talks basketball.

93. 93. Folge 93

    18. Feb. 2000

    ""Backstage,"" Day 10: After chatting with Robin Williams, Tom Arnold openly comments that he's disappointed that Jack Hanna didn't bring any animals to the set. Tonight's clips: Robin storms out of the backdrop (see Show #0001); Dave meets Frisco hippie Manny Papp (see Show #0589); Dave makes baby talk with a monkey.

94. 94. Folge 94

    21. Feb. 2000

    Dave introduces the surgeons that saved his life and welcomes (for the third time in two months) Regis.

95. 95. Folge 95

    22. Feb. 2000

    Bill Cosby opens up a box of basketball cards with Vince Carter.

96. 96. Folge 96

    23. Feb. 2000

    In his first post-surgery rant, Dave hollers about having to be driven to work for a while, and then really fumes about having to drink decaffeinated coffee; during a segment called ""How The Media Covered Dave's Surgery,"" Dave shows a (bogus) supermarket tabloid stating that he had actually given birth to quintuplets.

97. 97. Folge 97

    24. Feb. 2000

    Kathie Lee Gifford becomes the latest guest host to alternate with Dave while he continues to recuperate from heart surgery. Tonight, she gets heckled by an audience member who notices that she's not wearing a bra, to which she snaps back, ""Go wear a jock strap!""

98. 98. Folge 98

    25. Feb. 2000

    Mailbag: George Clarke addresses the comments made about his weight problem, and Dave flashes back to when he woke up from surgery resembling Don King. Also, Hank Hill (of ""King of the Hill"") wishes Dave to get well.

99. 99. Folge 99

    28. Feb. 2000

    ""Biff Henderson's America"" wrecks havoc in Badger, Minnesota, while Ian Anderson of Jethro Tull performs from his new album.

100. 100. Folge 100

     29. Feb. 2000

     David Brenner fills in for Dave and does about ten minutes of stand-up. Later, he chats with Aida Turturro of The Sopranos.

101. 101. Folge 101

     1. März 2000

     Dave continues to rant about decaffeinated coffee; George W. Bush is interrogated live via satellite; Fiona Apple performs ""On The Bound.""

102. 102. Folge 102

     2. März 2000

     Nathan Lane is the latest fill-in host, and he introduces a short film about the many perks of taking over for Dave. Later, he sings a song from the musical You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown with Kristin Chenoweth.

103. 103. Folge 103

     3. März 2000

     Steely Dan promotes its first album in two decades, ""Two Against Nature.""

104. 104. Folge 104

     6. März 2000

     Paul is wearing a white tailored suit tonight, prompting Dave to point out that the bandleader is the musical director of the upcoming Rock n' Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremonies. Also, Sandra and Nadine help Dave celebrate eighteen years in late night, even though the anniversary was over a month ago.

105. 105. Folge 105

     7. März 2000

     Janeane Garofalo becomes the latest guest host; ""slide whistle legend"" Bazeel sits in; Janeane does tonight's interviews sitting in a school desk placed in front of Dave's desk; Bob Odenkirk and David Cross make funny noises; Bazeel and the band performs ""Wipe Out.""

106. 106. Folge 106

     8. März 2000

     During ""Campaign 2000,"" Maria fills in for Rob, who's too busy working on the NBC pilot Ed; Biff presents the winning contestant of tonight's ""Beat the Clock"" with the home version of the game (a checkerboard); ""Phil Carmichael"" of CBS Promotions (Bill DeLace) does a presentation on ratings stunts.

107. 107. Folge 107

     9. März 2000

     Guest host Dana Carvey chats with former ""SNL"" cronies Jon Lovitz and Al Franken.

108. 108. Folge 108

     10. März 2000
109. 109. Folge 109

     20. März 2000

     In a remarkably lengthy edition of ""Campaign 2000,"" Dave decides not to perform a piece comparing Bush and Gore, and then rants about his cable service. Afterwards, he admits that this is his last night in television, so he introduces his family, then claims he's moving to St. Louis to work for Ralston Purina. Also, while cooking with Martha Stewart, Dave attempts to juggle eggs.

110. 110. Folge 110

     21. März 2000

     Biff devours the first robin of spring; the disgusting Turkish guy disappears; Pat and Kenny toss Matthew Broderick's birthday cake off the roof.

111. 111. Folge 111

     22. März 2000

     Out on 53rd Street, Biff has a hand counter to help with the ongoing US Census; Dave shows a clip of Barbara Walters making a weird facial reaction during her latest Oscar special; the Gore-Bush bit from two nights ago is finally performed in its entirety; Biff counts a total of 1,482 people in the United States.

112. 112. Folge 112

     27. März 2000

     Rob Burnett returns to his desk on the corner of the stage; during ""Campaign 2000,"" Dave comments on CBS' new slogan (""The address… is CBS"") and cracks wise on Gene Keady's hair; during the Top Ten, Dave makes a rare bald joke aimed at Paul.

113. 113. Folge 113

     28. März 2000

     Cold opening: Dr. Henry Kissinger announces that he's Dave's latest guest host, only to learn rather abruptly that Dave isn't sick anymore. Also, Dave has Rupert make a Hello Deli's latest menu addition, the kosher-friendly ""Paul Shaffer Sandwich,"" and a few minutes later Rupert delivers it to its namesake.

114. 114. Folge 114

     29. März 2000

     Paul is introduced as Gaston Mazacani; Rob tells a funny story about an incident he had with a cab driver; during a segment called ""What I like about Spring,"" Alan unwittingly admits that he's on the down low.

115. 115. Folge 115

     30. März 2000

     Dave demonstrates the ""magic"" of decaffeinated coffee by mixing food coloring in water.

116. 116. Folge 116

     31. März 2000

     During Campaign 2000, nobody can muster up any interesting topics, so Dave discusses Daylight Savings Time. Later, Dave brings up the recently-announced discovery that most gay men have unusual finger length, so Dave, Paul and Biff (in a dress) check their hands.

117. 117. Folge 117

     3. Apr. 2000

     Campaign 2000: Dave finds a tick on his suit, panics, calls Dr. Lou Aronne, then shows three ticks close-up using a special camera.

118. 118. Folge 118

     4. Apr. 2000

     Dave announces that the show is adopting (and thus protecting) Cuban refugee Elian Gonzalez; Rupert makes a Biff Henderson sandwich for Paul, but not for Biff; Dave mentions that he received a phone call from Johnny Carson shortly after his shout-out last week.

119. 119. Folge 119

     5. Apr. 2000
120. 120. Folge 120

     6. Apr. 2000
121. 121. Folge 121

     7. Apr. 2000

     Actor Stephen Tobolowsky sits in; during Mailbag, we learn that Tony is Fidel Castro's estranged son; Jon Stewart tries to give Dave a human heart, and after Dave declines, Jon walks offstage and puts it back in a very annoyed Tony Randall.

122. 122. Folge 122

     10. Apr. 2000
123. 123. Folge 123

     11. Apr. 2000

     Dave shows a clip of the recent live television remake of Fail Safe to demonstrate how lax CBS is at preventing profanities from being heard on-air. Also, Jenna Elfman promotes Keeping the Faith.

124. 124. Folge 124

     12. Apr. 2000

     Dave announces he's 41 today because he's not counting his 12 years at NBC; during a segment called ""Job Hunting Tips,"" a barbershop quartet sings intern Bob Dickerson's resume; Richard Simmons calls up Daddy to wish him a happy birthday, and Dave promptly hangs up on him.

125. 125. Folge 125

     13. Apr. 2000

     Campaign 2000: Dave honors a bald audience member. Later, Biff hands out Broadway tickets to two couples in the audience.

126. 126. Folge 126

     14. Apr. 2000

     Mick Taylor of the Rolling Stones sits in; with nothing to discuss, ""Campaign 2000"" lasts exactly six seconds; during Mailbag, Dave and Paul star in the new crime drama ""Good Cop, Good Cop.""

127. 127. Folge 127

     24. Apr. 2000

     Paul says his 86-year-old father, Bernard Shaffer, had a quintuple bypass yesterday and later Bruce Kapler admits that his dad had a mere double bypass a year ago. Also, Dave stops the show to read the latest issue of Oprah's magazine.

128. 128. Folge 128

     25. Apr. 2000

     After discussing Oprah's magazine on and off for the last few weeks, Dave announces that the first issue of ""D,"" the Dave magazine, has finally been rolled out. Also, Alan interrupts ""Campaign 2000"" to announce he's been reunited with his fat German son.

129. 129. Folge 129

     26. Apr. 2000

     The INS captures and seizes Tony (twice); Purdue University basketball coach Gene Keady presents the Top Ten; The Smashing Pumpkins perform ""Blue Skies Bring Tears.""

130. 130. Folge 130

     27. Apr. 2000

     The INS harasses Tony again; Rob Burnett appears live via satellite from LA for ""Campaign 2000""; Alan and his fat, gender-confused German son celebrate Take Your Daughters to Work Day.

131. 131. Folge 131

     28. Apr. 2000

     During Mailbag, Alan admits to doing the deed with Janet Reno; production assistant Jeremy Weiner is subjected to Paul's favorite game, ""Staffer/Not a Staffer""; David Wells and Bernie Williams present the Top Ten.

132. 132. Folge 132

     1. Mai 2000

     Jimmy Webb and Glen Campbell sit in; Dave announces the blood test following last week's tick incident came out negative; in homage to a trend that sweeping various TV shows nowadays, ""Campaign 2000"" is shown in letterbox; independent film maker Mark Borchardt presents his interview with former Presidential candidate Gary Bauer.

133. 133. Folge 133

     2. Mai 2000

     Live via satellite, we go to Preston Luggage in Dallas for another lengthy chat with Al Cordova and his assistant Kathy. Also, during ""Campaign 2000,"" Maria Pope introduces Rob Burnett, who walks onstage to a standing ovation.

134. 134. Folge 134

     3. Mai 2000

     Dave honors ""Great Bald Men throughout History"" (him, Paul, and Dwight D. Eisenhower), while we watch the latest round of ""Biff Henderson's Fun with a Stopwatch.""

135. 135. Folge 135

     4. Mai 2000

     Julia Louis-Dreyfus sings a song from West Side Story, and Jerry Seinfeld shows up to ""sing"" with her. Also, Dave shows footage of a woman dropping a bowling ball on her husband's noggin.

136. 136. Folge 136

     5. Mai 2000

     Dave announces he was pulled over for speeding again, then kisses up to the New York State police; during ""Campaign 2000,"" Dave sings the praises of Tivo; ten jockeys present the Top Ten.

137. 137. Folge 137

     8. Mai 2000

     Apparently, Michelle O'Calaghan had another baby over the weekend; Dave says he's been called to jury duty, prompting a brief state of panic; during another ""What's New"" segment, Pat and Kenny attempt to recite Shakespeare; a morbidly obese man is introduced as the winning jockey of last weekend's Kentucky Derby.

138. 138. Folge 138

     9. Mai 2000

     Dave continues to comment on the jury duty situation; the outside cam heads for Joe G's to play ""Would You Like To Win a Phony Check for 350 Million Dollars?""; after three years of struggling, Rob Burnett finally shows footage of his daughters not being afraid of the Easter Bunny.

139. 139. Folge 139

     10. Mai 2000

     Dave shows a CNN clip and a newspaper article pertaining to the jury duty controversy; during ""Campaign 2000,"" Paul admits he had a nightmare involving Maria Pope; Caroline Rhea discusses relationships.

140. 140. Folge 140

     11. Mai 2000

     Kathie Lee Gifford discusses her pending departure from her talk show, then ""sings"" ""Love Never Fails.""

141. 141. Folge 141

     12. Mai 2000

     Rob and Dave go over the ground rules for Richard Simmons' latest visit tonight, including permission to use a fire extinguisher on Richard if needed; during Mailbag, Dave becomes pen-pals with viewer Tyler Gatlin; ten celebrity moms (including Gerard and Dorothy) present the Top Ten, though it wouldn't become a yearly tradition until 2002.

142. 142. Folge 142

     15. Mai 2000

     Peter Frampton fills in for Felicia Collins, who had a gig; Paul mentions that Anton is getting married over this coming weekend; Rob announces that Ed has officially been picked up for NBC's fall schedule.

143. 143. Folge 143

     16. Mai 2000

     Dave mangles the song ""Memory,"" while Rupert and Tony Randall are invited to ""Campaign 2000"" but have absolutely nothing worth saying.

144. 144. Folge 144

     17. Mai 2000

     Campaign 2000: Dave mentions the final episode of Beverly Hills, 90210, which proceeds into another one of Alan's crying jags.

145. 145. Folge 145

     18. Mai 2000

     A man pretending to be Les Moonves delivers a Murder, She Wrote to Dave; the retirement of longtime White House press corps member Helen Thomas is discussed, so Dave shows a gag reel showing memorable moments of her career dating back to 1492; Dave promotes tomorrow night's bowling ball stunt.

146. 146. Folge 146

     19. Mai 2000

     Dave announces that this is the season finale; Dave and Maria bid farewell to Rob Burnett, who will now be busy at work with Ed; Tonya Smith drops a bowling ball on the head of Ken Richmond from 12 feet above the stage; Ringo Starr and the All-Starr Band sing ""With a Little Help from My Friends.""

147. 147. Folge 147

     22. Mai 2000

     Dave has problems adjusting the lumbar of his chair; Maria Pope brags about sleeping 21 hours straight; Michael J. Fox discusses his health-related ""retirement"" from television.

148. 148. Folge 148

     23. Mai 2000

     Buzz Aldrin interviews this year's nominees for the Daytime Emmys in a spacesuit; Mujibur and Sirajul make a basketball wager with Rupert; Dave flips through a furniture catalog; Matchbox Twenty performs ""Crutch"" out on the sidewalk.

149. 149. Folge 149

     24. Mai 2000

     James Earl Jones reads excerpts from Richard Simmons' new autobiography; ""Biff Henderson's America"" spends a couple of days in Calhoun, Missouri; a man pretending to be Les Moonves promotes the new game show Survivor while dressed up as Moses.

150. 150. Folge 150

     25. Mai 2000

     ""Biff's Fun with a Stopwatch"" goes to a Pacers playoff game, during which he shoplifts, then harasses a fat guy.

151. 151. Folge 151

     26. Mai 2000

     Dave drops his flipped pencil; during Mailbag, ""Bob Knight"" (Gerard) cannibalizes one of his players; Dave discusses his new chair.

152. 152. Folge 152

     5. Juni 2000
153. 153. Folge 153

     6. Juni 2000

     Dave makes his first-ever comments on the CBS' latest hit Survivor, and then brings up jury duty again, exclaiming ""Some dudes will be going down!""

154. 154. Folge 154

     7. Juni 2000

     Dave says Campaign 2000 is ""largely void of content, (and) just a big waste of time."" During tonight's segment, however, Paul openly wishes that they would use his name as a clue on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? Also, Alan gives tips for summer safety, which quickly morphs into an excuse to rip off his shirt and pour suntan lotion all over his body.

155. 155. Folge 155

     8. Juni 2000

     Dave introduces Paul as Wayne ""Fat Boy"" Ewing; in honor of Survivor, George Clarke locks himself in the boiler room with nothing but a video camera and some rations, and eventually ends up chewing his arm off; Biff reports from Game 1 of the NBA Finals in Los Angeles.

156. 156. Folge 156

     9. Juni 2000

     Paul hosts a game called ""Staffer / Not a Staffer,"" in which Dave must guess if the person onstage is one of his underlings. He correctly guesses that it is a staffer; talent researcher Nick Prueher. Also, Maria Pope discusses a recent trip to Hooters.

157. 157. Folge 157

     12. Juni 2000

     Dave announces that he's fulfilled his jury duty up in Connecticut (he didn't make the cut); George Clarke continues to hold on for dear life in the boiler room; Biff visits the NBA Finals in LA; Maria and Paul offer their condolences to Dave.

158. 158. Folge 158

     13. Juni 2000

     Pat Farmer fixes Dave's chair; during an outside cam bit involving the CBS Store and a new electronics shop next door, Tony Randall is found standing on the roof for no particular reason; the 2000 Stanley Cup Champion New Jersey Devils walk onstage for ""Campaign 2000,"" then hang out at the CBS Store.

159. 159. Folge 159

     14. Juni 2000

     Dave announces the birth of Kathy Mavrikakis' daughter; George Clarke is now trapped in the boiler room with two prostitutes, and then declares himself a ""Volcano God""; Isaac Hayes conducts an orchestra performing the theme from Shaft.

160. 160. Folge 160

     15. Juni 2000

     An old man (not Calvert) shuffles his feet onstage at the end of the monologue, then walks away; for Campaign 2000, Maria introduces Stacey Stillman, the first Survivor loser to appear on the Late Show; Dave tastes Naomi Campbell's new shower gel.

161. 161. Folge 161

     16. Juni 2000

     Laurie Diamond brings Dave a new cup of coffee after someone steals his mug; during Mailbag, Gerard comments on Survivor; during ""Stupid Pet Tricks,"" Dave accidentally steps on dog's tail and gets bitten on the face.

162. 162. Folge 162

     19. Juni 2000
163. 163. Folge 163

     20. Juni 2000

     Paul Rodgers of Bad Company sits in on vocals; after Dave worries about possible civil disobedience in downtown LA after the Lakers' NBA Championship, Harold Larkin opens the door to reveal rioting outside the theater; Mark Wahlberg promotes The Perfect Storm.

164. 164. Folge 164

     21. Juni 2000

     Dave shows a (phony) tape of Tiger Woods disintegrating opponents' balls with his laser eyes; during Campaign 2000, ""Rita Buttgas"" (Jude Brennan) returns to celebrate the one-year anniversary of her $100 victory on ""Alan's Secret Word"" and discusses the hardships she's had since her fleeting fame fizzled; Dana Carvey and Dave share stories about their heart problems.

165. 165. Folge 165

     22. Juni 2000

     George continues to hold on to dear life in the boiler room; ""non-surviving Survivor"" Ramona Gray interrupts ""Campaign 2000""; PJ Olsson performs ""Visine.""

166. 166. Folge 166

     23. Juni 2000

     Dave demonstrates troubles with newscasters who look at the wrong camera by moving his head every five seconds; during Mailbag, Biff chats with (pre-recorded) footage of Shaquille O'Neal; Worldwide Pants production assistant Allison Abbate is the latest to be subjected to ""Staffer- Not a Staffer.""

167. 167. Folge 167

     26. Juni 2000

     Dave repeats the footage of the dog bite from last week, now claiming that a ""wild dingo"" gave him rabies; Dave says George W. Bush is ""(as) dumb as a box of tools""; after his interview, Tom Brokaw walks straight back to Rockefeller Center.

168. 168. Folge 168

     27. Juni 2000

     Dave confesses that he has a slight crush on British news anchor Daljit Dhaliwal. Later, Alan interrupts Dave to congratulate the genetics scientists for cracking the genetic code, then offers ""specimens"" for the lady researchers.

169. 169. Folge 169

     28. Juni 2000

     Ted Nugent sits in; Dave rants about the ""wild island sex"" on Survivor; Martha Stewart arrives onstage on a red, white and blue bike, then gives The Nuge a guitar case made entirely of pinecones.

170. 170. Folge 170

     29. Juni 2000

     Maria tells Dave that newscaster/hottie Daljit Dhaliwal has been booked for next week, while Dave announces that he's doing a favor for a cop who stopped him for speeding recently by having him appear on the show. Also, Dave and Survivor loser Dirk Been comment on how everybody's losing weight on the show except Richard Hatch.

171. 171. Folge 171

     30. Juni 2000

     Dave brags that he's going to a gin n' tonic party after the show to look for some babes; during Mailbag, Biff blows Dan Rather's head off; a social worker named Lauren is the first real decoy to appear on ""Staffer- Not a Staffer.""

172. 172. Folge 172

     3. Juli 2000

     Dave plays the tapes of the dog bite and the deer attack yet again; during Campaign 2000, Maria introduces Dave to a First Mate in the US Navy, and 200 sailors from the USS Nassau storm the stage right afterward; Brian Wilson and Friends perform ""Sloop John B.""

173. 173. Folge 173

     4. Juli 2000

     Dave introduces the ""Late Show Liberty Dancers""; live via telephone, the owner of a nearby fireworks shop shoots explosives; the finalists of this year's National Hollerin' Championship perform onstage.

174. 174. Folge 174

     5. Juli 2000

     The ""Liberty Dancers"" are rechristened ""The 5th of July Dancers""; an audience guy with a very distinctive goatee is the subject of a reality show-themed Top Ten; Dave bullies Tony into promoting his self-titled internet program.

175. 175. Folge 175

     6. Juli 2000

     Dave finally meets Daljit Dhaliwal, who seems more interested in discussing world affairs then responding to Dave's thinly-veiled flirting. Also, Shawn Wayans promotes Scary Movie.

176. 176. Folge 176

     7. Juli 2000

     Pat and Kenny replace Dave's chair; Dave welcomes Sgt. John Best of the Marshall (Texas) Police Department as the new co-host of the show; Jerry Foley appears on ""Staffer- Not a Staffer"" and nearly stumps Dave.

177. 177. Folge 177

     17. Juli 2000

     Dave asks the viewers at home to have a nice, tasty beverage while they watch the show; Survivor tenth-place finisher Gretchen Cordy drops by; Elliott Smith performs ""Somebody That I Used to Know.""

178. 178. Folge 178

     18. Juli 2000

     Live from the theater basement, it's ""Let's Look for Rats."" The piece gets off to a slow start, until Alan runs downstairs to scare them into appearing on camera.

179. 179. Folge 179

     19. Juli 2000

     Dave continues to refer to Paul as Wayne ""Fat Boy"" Ewing; Alan shows Dave photos from his recent vacation; Maria confirms that Al Gore's interested in being a guest on the show; Ben Folds Five (in their last TV appearance) performs ""Regrets.""

180. 180. Folge 180

     20. Juli 2000

     Continuing with a running gag that started the previous week, Dave shows a ""Anna Kournikova Play of the Day"" (footage of her drinking a water bottle), followed by similar clips from Don Zimmer and Larry King. Also, Gerard impersonates Survivor loser Greg Buis (who was sick) for a spirited chat during ""Campaign 2000.""

181. 181. Folge 181

     21. Juli 2000

     Dave trims off half of his tie; Alan has a crying jag over Kathie Lee Gifford's departure from her daytime talk show; Dave and Jon Stewart discuss politics.

182. 182. Folge 182

     24. Juli 2000

     Pat and Kenny play Frisbee on the roof; the latest roll call introduces us to such people behind-the-scenes as Tony Mendez's puppet-master, Dave's fiancé and Paul's girlfriend (the same woman), and a staffer who's still living in his Y2K bunker; Dave suggests that a proposed Bush-Gore debate on the show will utilize Jai Alai scoring.

183. 183. Folge 183

     25. Juli 2000

     Dave suggests that someone on the staff is messing around with his chair; during ""Campaign 2000,"" Maria Pope tells Dave that there has been no word from the Bush camp; George Plimpton reads the new Harry Potter book, but not aloud; Ween performs ""Even If You Don't.""

184. 184. Folge 184

     26. Juli 2000

     A new controversy brews as Dave claims he's going to dust his chair for ""ass prints""; Harold Larkin is attacked by a giant can of Off! bug spray; Kathie Lee Gifford receives a farewell present from Dave.

185. 185. Folge 185

     27. Juli 2000

     An audience member names all ten of her grandkids; the entire theater is filled with mosquito spray; Kathie Lee returns to present the Top Ten.

186. 186. Folge 186

     28. Juli 2000

     Dave hits Alan with a baseball bat; a blonde woman pretending to be Kathie Lee says goodbye forever to Dave; David Gray performs ""Babylon.""

187. 187. Folge 187

     31. Juli 2000

     Dave shows (bogus) footage of a guy with defibrillator paddles standing near Dick Cheney during a television interview. Later, Macy Gray sings ""I Try.""

188. 188. Folge 188

     1. Aug. 2000

     During ""Campaign 2000,"" Tony Randall botches a comedy piece. Later, Nathan Lane talks about his dog and sings.

189. 189. Folge 189

     2. Aug. 2000

     Alan goes berzerk and chases a man outside. Later, Dave chats with President Clinton's press secretary Joe Lockhart.

190. 190. Folge 190

     3. Aug. 2000

     Maria introduces Dave to ""Survivor"" contestant Gervase Peterson. Later, NBC weatherman Al Roker promotes his new book.

191. 191. Folge 191

     4. Aug. 2000

     During CBS Mailbag, Mujibur and Sirajul debate ""Do you like monkeys?"", which results in a lengthy fistfight. Later, after another one of Inky Mendez's tantrums, we see an ad for ""Dave and Tony's How to Rant In Spanish"" educational videotape.

192. 192. Folge 192

     7. Aug. 2000

     For no apparent reason, the CEO of Qualcomm presents Dave with a check for $25,000. Later, Dave chats with Jean Jordan, the stripper-turned-writer who was eliminated from ""Big Brother 1.""

193. 193. Folge 193

     8. Aug. 2000

     ""The Late Show Iron Chef"" pits Rupert Jee against Joe G. Rupert wins decisively with his chicken rollatini.

194. 194. Folge 194

     9. Aug. 2000

     Biff goes outside to count sweaty people; during ""Campaign 2000,"" Alan interrupts Maria with a soulful rendition of ""Send in the Clowns.""

195. 195. Folge 195

     10. Aug. 2000

     Paul joins Dave for ""Know Your Jewish U.S. Senators."" During ""Campaign 2000,"" Maria introduces Dave to ""Survivor I"" runner-up Colleen Haskell.

196. 196. Folge 196

     11. Aug. 2000

     Vince Vaughn promotes ""The Cell,"" while Maria expresses her optimism in a possible debate between George W. Bush and Al Gore right here on the show.